What have I being doing all these while?

Today went to KTV with my CG. I didn't really sing a lot of songs because I hardly listen to the radios these days. I never have the habit in the first place and I don't really appreciates it. Hahaha.

The only music that I like in the past are all rock music such as Bon Jovi and Duran Duran. Now I only listen to Christian Music. So I felt many of the songs that my members sang in KTV are really alien to me, save for a few really old songs. Hahaha.

Nonetheless, I still had fun, smiling and laughing all the way as they prank and make silly noises while singing. I did what I could have only done if I am not singing, I video recorded the whole thing with my phone. Hahaha. Quite good. My members are all eager to get the clips from me.

Desmond, Alex and I went down to Eunice's place to help her fix her wardrobe after KTV. For some reason, everyone was really tired. For me, it was because I was rushing my project for the past few days. The wardrobe wasn't difficult to fix up.

***

On the way home, I closed my eyes on the train asn kinda doze off. As I quiet down, I start to hear the Spirit within me asking me.

"What have I being doing all these while?"

I start to reflect myself upon this question and while doing so, my ears became very open and I could hear everything that Desmond is saying through the phone, at the point when he was talking about spirituality and learning to press in into God and our leaders.

Rev. Ulf's words also came to me, "Don't end up reaching for something only to lose what is truly important."

"What have I being doing all these while?"

I have being in church for almost six years. I have changed much, I have gained much and I have also lost much. I have my share of blessings, as well as my share of hurts and corrections. One thing I know, I have grown and I am a much better person compare to who I was before I was saved. In fact, I have also changed much since the past one year.

However, I came to realise that, I am beginning to feel complacent. I am not as hungry for the spiritual stuff as I used to be. I seems to do things just because I enjoy doing it, not because I want to do it with the glory of GOD. I don't grumble, I don't complain, in fact, I really enjoy doing things. But what difference does that make me from an ordinary, helpful non-believer? It is really just vanity.

"What have I being doing all these while?"

Even though the words Desmond said was for the other person through the phone, I was still very stirred up by what he had said.

Truly, everything is always so divine.

The moment I got home, I can really sense God touching me as I prayed. I could feel that the one important thing to pray for was really to pray for my leaders, Brother Ming Jin and Irene. The main thing that God really want me to do now, is to press in into their lives.

I don't know how I am going to do that. Write a card? Call them? It is not easy because they are both busy and also the fact that they are leaders. But at least there is one thing that I can do everyday, I can pray for them. And if God tells me to press in, He will provide the way and the means for me to do so.

It all just depend on how hungry I am for it and to what extent am I willing to do it. God always provide more for great hunger. Today, I rededicate myself to Jesus.

GOD IS GOOD. :)